Today is one of those days that I just dont want to get out of bed A photo can say more than a thousands words and what I feel today can be described by looking at the photos above Laptop between the sheets a warm chocolate and my phone on the side Simple things make me happy

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Winter in Swedish Lapland Last winter we headed to the far North for an adventure along glistening ice covered roads through snow covered forests and past some of the most breathtaking homes and cabins we have ever seen to take in the beauty of Swedish Lapland Here is a selection of photos from our travels to ins

I dont usually like to do super personal posts on here but I wanted to be honest through all of the rose tinted latte art insta shots that life just aint that perfect Right now Im in a self shut down mode My boyfriend just moved to Jakarta for 6 months and my mood has been on a steady decline alongside my health and Ive gone from cancelling dinner plans to cancelling life and staying at home I constantly feel like I might burst into tears and I feel really quite pathetic as someone who coped independently sans boyfriend for a whole 24 years of my life what the hell has happened to me I should point out that in general this time of year gets me down A few years ago I was suffering bad with stress and anxiety which ended in a nervous breakdown and me being signed off work ohhhh about 2 days before christmas excellent timing I spent most of that christmas day in my room crying over a particularly rude text from a colleague but we wont get into that one now! Lets just say this time of year brings back bad memories and Im not sure if its just all of the people or all of the plans but something makes me want to quietly back out of the room and close the door on my social life So back to now I just face timed with my boyfriend so obviously Im looking at flights to Jakarta and planning my move but realistically I just went full time blogging and whilst people say but you can work from anywhere you really cant not long term anyway So here I am miserable and thousands of miles away from my literal other half I feel split in two and havent eaten a proper meal other than chocolate since before Christmas day I know it sounds silly but even when he was here I was mourning my loss and for that I cant forgive myself Those last few days I was moody and miserable because I knew I was losing him and now hes actually gone all I can think is you stupid cow you wasted those days Anyway this has completely turned into one huge rant pitty party which it totally wasnt meant to be I just wanted to kind of give you an insight into the other side of my life because right now Im living precariously through perfectly posed instagrams because otherwise Id be posting a box of tissues and chocolate wrappers and no one wants to see that Im giving myself until 2017 to mope and be miserable then Im sorting myself and being a total girlboss so its ok to mope until then right! ! ME Facebook Twitter Youtube Bloglovin

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